"Kindred Spirits are not so scarce as I used to think. It's splendid to find out there are so many of them in the world."
-L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables
Anne made this comment about a lady who previously had gotten crossways with Anne, but in the end Anne realized there really were some similarities they had in common.
"A bosom friend--an intimate friend, you know--a really kindred spirit to whom I can confide my inmost soul. I've dreamed of meeting her all my life. I never really supposed I would, but so many of my loveliest dreams have come true all at once that perhaps this one will, too. Do you think it's possible?
Anne said this to Marilla shortly after she arrived at Avonlea.
The honesty of Anne's words cut straight to the heart. Don't we as women all wish for a true 'kindred spirit', or a true 'bosom friend'?
Growing up shy, bashful, and backwards created huge obstacles in finding a kindred spirit, or a bosom friend. I had a tendency to confide in my horses, talk to my horses, enjoy my horses, and dream about my horses. Taking time to establish a strong relationship was too much stress for someone so shy. It was just easier to build a relationship with a horse. Funny I know, but it worked for me. I could stay in my comfort zone of not communicating, not exchanging thoughts and feelings, not worrying about if or when I'd last talked to someone, and enjoy the solitude with a large warm blooded animal. The effort it would take to establish a kindred spirit or bosom friend was too great for this shy girl.
I think the years spent with my grandma in her later years, and becoming a grandma myself, required me to go at a slower pace than usual. The slower pace gave me time to become more reflective, and think more about what was actually happening around me. In both of these relationships I started to realize it was the small things that meant the most. It was the flowers picked, the hay bales jumped, the dollar store visited frequently, the drive to a cousin's house, the books we read, the Thomas trains pushed, the pinto beans and cornbread we ate, the apples we picked from the back yard, and the peaches we picked at the orchard, these were the things I treasured the most. I was taught in both these relationships we have but one turn in life. I think it was the realization of the one turn in life that opened me up enough to give space to the possibility of a kindred spirit or bosom friend.
Finding someone you can consider a 'kindred spirit' or a 'bosom friend' is a true rarity. There are a couple women I consider have earned a ranking in my book as a both a 'kindred spirit' and a 'bosom friend', they are my grandma (Modenia) and my sister (Cindy). With both these women I have felt, at times, they knew me better than I knew myself (and that is scary). However, they were neither judgmental or critical. They always listened with an attentive ear and loving heart. Offering advice only when asked. Giving a nod of the head in agreement with me, or giving me a long pause in the conversation if they disagreed. I got the point, and they never had to say a thing.
There have also been a few women I consider to be a very strong 'kindred spirit'. Each relationship occurred at a time, and in a place I totally was not expecting. They blossomed on their own with very little nurturing. They just showed up out of the blue. I think God put them in my path at a specific time in my life because it was just what I needed to get me thru. He knew what I was going to need before I did. He went ahead of me preparing the way by placing these women in life. I'll not mention their names, but I have thanked God for giving them to me just when I needed them. Each 'kindred spirit' has it's own unique set of blueprints, which create our unique relationship. There are still struggles within myself to open up, but the rewards received from each of these relationships have been worth the risk.
As women, perhaps we can look for that special lady who needs encouraging, lifting up, prayed for, talked to, or just called. We can make a difference. I've had women make a difference in me, and I'm not sure they even know. If the opportunity presents itself I will tell them what they have meant to me. It was the small things they did, the gesture of kindness, a prayer said for me, the acknowledgment that I was in the room, a smile given when I was feeling down, or maybe by an email or text just to say hi.
Many kindred spirits are in this world. Take the first step, open the door to the possibility of creating a kindred spirit. Who knows, in the end you may find yourself a new bosom friend. Wouldn't that be the biggest treat of all?
